What’s with the Long Face?

By Sarah Macfarlane

Blogs are as varied as the people who write them. Read on, and be enlightened

Contrary to beliefs among certain members of the Dairy Farming community, domesticated horses are very intelligent and emotional creatures. All horses are capable of basic emotions: happiness, playfulness, fear, likes and dislikes.

Horses are more visual with their communication than vocal. Their faces have almost as many muscles for expression as humans do, plus the bonus of highly mobile ears. The ears are the most important part of a horse’s expression; they combin with other facial changes to create a set of very recognizable expressions.

Why is humanizing our favourite 1000 pound four-legged mammal important for horse owners, riders, and non-horsey people alike?

Safety! Should you ever encounter a horse, being able to understand what that horse is thinking could save your life, or prevent a trip to the emergency room. On the other hand, learning equine expressions will open the door for confidence, further learning and friendship with your horse.

The following are the expressions you want to see. They're the least likely to put you in the hospital, and a solid assurance that your horse doesn't hate life.

Happy Horses will always have their ears pointed forward, and their muzzle (lips, nostrils and chin) will be relaxed. The eyes will be open and show no white around the upper eyelid, unless they are a Paint or an Appaloosa horse, who usually have white sclera [third eyelid] that is always visible.

Neutral Horses are very similar to Happy Horses, with the slight differences seen in sideways“loose” ears and sometimes eyes that appear half-closed. This expression is often seen when horses are eating hay or grazing.

Interested Horses are also called “Pretty Faces” and this is the most desired expression of equine photographers. The horse's ears will be pricked forward, the eyes bright and focused. The nostrils may be slightly flared to get a better scent of the situation. This one means you aren't being ignored! 

Nervous Horses can turn into dangerous situations in mere seconds. This is the one face equestrians dread to see. The ears will be tightly forward, the eyes wide and may show white around the upper lid. The lips will be tense, and the nostrils obviously flared. The horse may snort (a rattle sound) or blow (exhale very quickly). It is usually accompanied by lots of fancy, high-speed movement and human frustration.

Horses DO have brains that are capable of even complex emotions. A domesticated horse exposed to various situations and intelligences (humans) will observe and learn new behaviors over time.

A happy horse is a safe horse!

The Irritated Horse is one of the most important, but most commonly ignored expressions. An Irritated Horse has a 50/50 chance of either becoming a Nasty Horse or simply tolerating whatever is bugging them. The ears are angled backward, but not tight against the neck. The lips are tight and nostrils wrinkled with no flaring. The horse will usually elevate their head and neck and swish their tail.

The Nasty Horse is the one who says “Back off, or I’m gonna mess you up!” The ears are pinned flat against the neck (almost invisible), while the nostrils are very wrinkled and may be seen with bared or gnashing teeth. When the head and neck are raised above back-level, you’re being warned. If that head and neck drop any lower while wearing this expression, get out of there before you meet an 1100 pound Rick James!

The following expressions are some of the weirdest, and perhaps most human, faces you’ll ever see on a horse, and a true indication of just how intelligent (and nerdy) domesticated horses can become.

The Playful Horse is just being cute, silly, and having fun—until he tries to play with you! Take it from an author who knows: never, under any circumstances, try to play with a 1250 pound animal who doesn’t realize your 150 pounds can’t keep up! It’s all cute, goofy fun until you have a communication misunderstanding and somebody gets their collarbone broken. Playful horses will usually have sideways or forward-angled ears, half-closed eyes and wiggly, moving lips with top lip extended. This is an invitation. Always turn it down!

The Raised Imaginary Eyebrow Horse is rare, but usually the most intelligent horse in a stable. They are also the most arrogant, dominant and obnoxious horses. This expression has one ear forward, one ear backward, the head and neck turned. The inside eye shows whites, while the outside eye does not. The inside nostril is very wrinkled and the upper lip may be twitching, pointed, or pointing to one side. An exasperated sigh may be heard shortly after. 

Unimpressed Horses are my personal favourites. Their ears are as close to horizontal as possible, angled perfectly sideways. Their eyes are half-closed, and one or both nostrils are slightly wrinkled. A loud sigh is always heard. You might be doing something undignified if a horse gives you this expression.

Observing and respecting horses with these expressions will help keep you safe in your dealings with these large critters!

Now that you’ve read both sections and familiarized yourself with the long faces of this article, you can proudly say “I speak a few words of Horse!” to your friends, relatives, and random acquaintances!