People, I found love.
Just kidding. While OkCupid is an actual dating website, and the people on it are a bit more serious than those on the hookup apps I went on, it’s still not going to be a result. Meeting people online is kind of weird, I’ve come to realize. You can never fully figure out who they are, because conversations in-person, seeing their facial expressions, hearing the tone of their voice, watching how they act around you, reveals so much more than talking on the Internet. It’s like comparing a black and white photo to a high definition, full colour version. The quality is incomparable. And so is finding someone online in comparison to in-person.
I did have some great conversations on this app though. While there was the usual, “Are you sure you’re 23?,” “Would you consider an older man?” and a few odd messages, the people on a legitimate dating site are more genuine, and are not looking for a one night kind of thing—which was a nice change. There was actually a point where two different people had grabbed my attention. Sadly, one ended up ghosting me, and the other moved to BC. So there’s that. But the latter, Robert, was quite nice. We shared the same values on family, liked a lot of the same TV shows (anything Marvel or DC, The 100), and it was easy to talk to him.
OkCupid results: slightly restored my faith in dating apps, but I’m not the kind of person to use them.
As weird as this experience was, I’m glad I did it. It got me out of my comfort zone without having to put much effort into it, or fully scaring myself out of meeting people. Like that Tinder article said, maximum payout for minimal effort. These days, everyone has tried online dating once. Since everything else is online now, it makes sense that dating made the switch as well.
I have noticed that some apps tend to draw certain types of people though: the casual, “I don’t want anything serious” people who either have no time for or do not want an actual relationship; the ones who’d prefer one drunken night over those lazy Sunday mornings. Which does make me wonder: are the serious ones just not online, or are they slowly dying out? Have we modernized dating so much that casual dating has become the new norm over serious relationships?